(1) DON'T LOOK AT A NAKED LADY
Boy 1: Why do you run from a naked lady?
Boy 2: Because my mum said that if I look at a naked lady, I'll turn into stone. A part of me is getting hard already!
(2) NAMES OF WIVES
A man had 4 wives, and he called his...
4th wife..... Baby doll
3rd wife.....China doll
2nd wife.... Barbie doll
1st wife..... Panadol !
(3) HOW INDIA GOT ITS NAME
This is how India got its name.....
The king was having sex with his mistress while thinking a name of his country and his mistress ask him "Is it in dear?"
(4) RESEARCH FINDING
Research shows men are fatter than women because every night men get fresh milk & 2 big papayas while women only get 1 banana, 2 peanuts & 1 tea-spoon of starch!
(5) ARAB MAN
An arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.
"Your name please?"
"Abdul Aziz"
"Sex?"
"Six times a week!!"
"No, no, I mean male or female!"
"Doesn't matter, sometimes even camel!"
(6) SERVICE
Sex is like a restaurant.
Sometimes you get full satisfactory service and
sometimes you have to be satisfied with self-service
(7) HAPPY MAN
What makes a happy man?
Daughter on the cover of Cosmo.
Son on the cover of Sports Illustrated.
Mistress on the cover of Playboy
and .. Wife on the cover of "Missing Persons"
( SWIMSUIT
Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY section.
(9) GOOD AMBITION
Teacher: What do you want to become?
Little Johnny: Doctor !!
Teacher: Why?
Little Johnny: Because its the only profession where u can tell a woman to take off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.
(10) DENTIST
Woman complaining to dentist: "It's so painful, I'll rather have a baby than have a tooth removed."
Dentist: "Make up your mind soon, I'll adjust the chair accordingly."
(11) VIRGIN
Old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die. wanted her tombstone to read : BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN.
The engraver shortened it to: " RETURNED UNOPENED "
(12) OLD MAN AND YOUNG GIRL
75 yr old man got married to a 15 yr old girl.
On their first night both were crying..........Why???
Because she didn't know anything and he had forgotten everything.
Boy 1: Why do you run from a naked lady?
Boy 2: Because my mum said that if I look at a naked lady, I'll turn into stone. A part of me is getting hard already!
(2) NAMES OF WIVES
A man had 4 wives, and he called his...
4th wife..... Baby doll
3rd wife.....China doll
2nd wife.... Barbie doll
1st wife..... Panadol !
(3) HOW INDIA GOT ITS NAME
This is how India got its name.....
The king was having sex with his mistress while thinking a name of his country and his mistress ask him "Is it in dear?"
(4) RESEARCH FINDING
Research shows men are fatter than women because every night men get fresh milk & 2 big papayas while women only get 1 banana, 2 peanuts & 1 tea-spoon of starch!
(5) ARAB MAN
An arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.
"Your name please?"
"Abdul Aziz"
"Sex?"
"Six times a week!!"
"No, no, I mean male or female!"
"Doesn't matter, sometimes even camel!"
(6) SERVICE
Sex is like a restaurant.
Sometimes you get full satisfactory service and
sometimes you have to be satisfied with self-service
(7) HAPPY MAN
What makes a happy man?
Daughter on the cover of Cosmo.
Son on the cover of Sports Illustrated.
Mistress on the cover of Playboy
and .. Wife on the cover of "Missing Persons"
( SWIMSUIT
Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY section.
(9) GOOD AMBITION
Teacher: What do you want to become?
Little Johnny: Doctor !!
Teacher: Why?
Little Johnny: Because its the only profession where u can tell a woman to take off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.
(10) DENTIST
Woman complaining to dentist: "It's so painful, I'll rather have a baby than have a tooth removed."
Dentist: "Make up your mind soon, I'll adjust the chair accordingly."
(11) VIRGIN
Old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die. wanted her tombstone to read : BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN.
The engraver shortened it to: " RETURNED UNOPENED "
(12) OLD MAN AND YOUNG GIRL
75 yr old man got married to a 15 yr old girl.
On their first night both were crying..........Why???
Because she didn't know anything and he had forgotten everything.